January 2019

Just so you know:  I share links to my own work, in the hope you love it and share it...because I hope my book will be a best seller.  The sales of the book keep my content free to read and free of annoying adverts.  Any other links I share are to alert you to things I find awesome, interesting or worthy of attention: I get no kick-backs or payments or advantage.  I am very particular about what I share, and your feedback is always welcome.

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New on the Bellablog

Birth - is it about luck? 
Birth, for the modern human, is not without difficulty. 

Does it all come down to luck,
​or is it a matter of Good Management?

or could it be something else?

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New in Resources

Kids Fighting: Let Them Be 
by Tracey Cassels of Evolutionary Parenting may just be the insight you need if facing a clash of the siblings.  
The Tale of the Australian Handmaid (see below also)
The Wheel of Consent (see below also)
Access the resources here

New in the Support Group

Continuing on with the settling arguments among kids them, I have added some links to the parenting thread on punishment, discipline and gentle options.  
 Go to The Support Group 

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Interesting Articles and Ideas

The Tale of the Australian Handmaid

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Download File

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This is a short essay describing why childbirth is a multi faceted feminist issue.  

This ABCnews article shows the importance of finding real life connections and what one mum is doing to help create connection.

You can download this image in the resources

​The Wheel of Consent
I have been watching the free videos offered by Betty Martin, a Seattle based 'sexologist'.  The concept of consent has been my focus throughout 2018, and this focus is intensifying this year.  Consent troubles me deeply.  Perhaps Betty Martin's insights will help to unravel the reasons why consent is so troublesome?

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'Women's Work': How did you find the Christmas period?  What about throughout the year, generally?  Is there an assumption that you will perform certain tasks?  Have you ever heard of 'The Mental Load'?  or felt like you are thinking for everyone in the household?  Ever reached boiling point?  

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Have you heard of UBI? This article from women's agenda considers it a solution to the unpaid work problem.

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The Con in Consent:  there is so much more to consent than the descriptor amended to it.  The assumed, implied or expected yes that comes with seeking consent, is warped when a power imbalance occurs.  Fear of reprisal or conflict, or when the desire to please someone outweighs our intuition. When we begin with consent, we skip the most important step: actual decision making.  

This week, the issue of opt-in vs opt-out came up.  Not really a pregnancy or birth issue, but one that impacts our health related decisions.  This seems not dissimilar to the consent issue.  Whilst we split hairs over a blanket system, we ignore the actual point: a decision needs to be made.  An ACTIVE, informed and RECORDED decision.

These posts are from my wordpress exploration of opt-in vs opt-out and  consent:

Do your loved ones know?
looking at the organ donation decision
Opt-in vs Opt-out 
​what's hubris got to do with it?
The My Health Record: are you in or out?
DEADLINE is January 31st
I do not consent
a poem...well two poems really.

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What I am Reading

The Game Changer by Jason Fox ...I am a few awesome pages in, and so excited!  This book has lured me in, and I have been frustratingly unable to stay with it for more than a few pages at a time....so I am making time uninterrupted!  Using my new Lunation Annual Planner, I am trying something new: being organised.

I am also revisiting the ebook edition of Sara Wickham's 101 Tips for Planning, Writing, and Surviving Your Dissertation.  The application forms are in front of me.  The Big Leap is about to happen (hence the need to be organised).

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A poem to end with: Two choices emerged in a birthing ward

Based on Robert Frost's The Road not Taken, this poem explores the difference between wandering randomly, and walking knowingly.  Part pastiche and part commentary, the journey may be awesome either way, and is it a matter of chance?

On Saturday (January 19th) I will be road testing my new workshop design.  It explores the chance/unpredictable nature of birth that puts many people (healthcare workers included) off 'birth plans'.  It was preparing for this workshop that led me to The Game Changer​...something very wonderful is happening!  Stay Tuned!

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